Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Knowing Myself

Since I was a child I have known there are other realms that are not visible to the human sight -- yet are there in the spirit if one opens up the mind to the spiritual connections that are possible. As I grew older I listened to others who said faeries, spirits, other worlds than ours is just "all nonsense". So, I let go of what I thought was just childhood fantasies. Now I know better, for I have learned to listen to the voice of my soul. I have learned that it is ok to believe in the faery folk. They are there, just on the edge of our reality, just behind the veil that human kind brought down so long ago. I have learned to connect to and embrace the goddess within me and bring her forth to strengthen my femininity and learn to love who I am. I connect to many goddesses for the attributes each one has, yet the one I connect to the most is the Celtic goddess, Danu, the goddess of the Tuatha de Danann, an ancient tribe that fought many battles to win Ireland, then, when finally defeated, went underground to mingle with the faery. Danu is the goddess of waters, healing waters that bring forth love and compassion, insight into relationships, and enlightenment about myself. The river Danube was known in ancient times as Danuvius, which is a word from a now extinct Celtic Gaulish language, which comes from the root word danu, which means river. It is believed by some scholars and mythologists that the river was named after the goddess Danu. And this I believe also. Danu is like a river, a river that continues to flow with the times and through my life. I have learned to flow with it, to go where destiny takes me, and accept that which is my true path. I have walked on the dark side of my life, gone into places in my visions and meditations that I never realized existed, because all my life I have buried and shoved aside that which I could not understand or face. I have dealt with my demons and found within me the beauty of the goddess, the compassion and divinity of true love that begins within and flows out to embrace others in a divine way.
I learned much of what I know now with the help of one I love deeply. I have known him for just over a year, yet have known him all my life and even before that. I have never met him in person, for the physical distance between us is great. We connect spiritually and "talk" with each other on the internet. He is my spiritual teacher, mentor, guide, friend. I have a love for him I cannot explain, not even to him. I have tried and the right words just do not come out. It is just a part of me that cannot and will not ever be broken or explained away. The distance between us physically, as I said, is great -- yet we are close in spirit. When we talk on the internet, it is like he is sitting across the table from me and I hold his hand. I sometimes feel his touch on my hand or arm, and he has felt mine. I am not afraid to speak of these things, my beliefs, my spiritual connection to a man I have never met in person, for to me, it is my reality, my life. Too often people do not take the chance to love when it seems impossible, or to look behind the veil to other realms, or reach out and let the faery folk know you. To have looked within and to have found myself, my true path in life, is the most beautiful gift I have ever given to myself.

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